Happy Year of the OX!!

GONG HAY FAT CHOY!!

Best MLK day EVER

Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day!

Yesterday, 2 million spectators, Christy and I congregated between the Washington Memorial and Lincoln Memorial to watch the start of the inaugural ceremonies for President-Elect Obama.

The two hour event featured speeches and music by many high profile celebrities, a majority of them were African American, such as Denzel Washington, Jamie Foxx, Queen Latifah, Mary J. Blige, Beyonce, Stevie Wonder, Usher, Forrest Whittiker, Samuel L. Jackson, Tiger Woods, John Legend, Herbie Hancock and more!! I thought to myself, wow, this must be the first time ever that so many African Americans were asked to perform and celebrate with the incoming president... and, as a result, this must be the first time it's so much fun! I mean, Jamie Foxx did a shout out to Chi-town, even hollered Chicago's area code "312" at the steps of the Lincoln Memorial. How awesome is that? I am so happy that we finally have a black president. Let's keep it real and keep it going!

Pictorial of how XL and DYY became BFFs

Pictorial by: Design Director DBB.

Entitled:
"Friendship Has No Boundaries, Shares One Language, Sings in Amazing Chinese Unison."

Also known as:
"No Cab in Sight at 2 AM While Zero Degrees in Shanghai, Fuck that Shit, Let's Stay Home and Party."

XL, DBB and DYY wish all you bitches a happy new year!

Holiday Update

I'm up north visiting my family for the holidays. So once again, I must be wholesome and pure. That is why I'm wearing a pilgrim hat and showing off pilgrim art, both made by my younger nephew Elliot. Part of being wholesome and pure is immersing in the holiday spirit. For reasons I never quite understood, celebrating Christmas the day after Thanksgiving is a tradition in America. And what is good for America is good for my family. We shall not be exempt from such celebrations.
Here we are at Downtown San Jose. We were suppose to go ice skating, but the rink was closed. So were all the children's rides and the public library. Yes, Downtown San Jose was booty overall. But we still remained in the holiday spirit and took pictures with the many Christmas decorations scattered throughout the main street.

Here is a Christmas tree decorated with pictures of missing children. Above each picture is the word "VANISHED".

Um, can you say downer?

And here is a lovely nativity scene. But where is Baby Jesus? He must be VANISHED. Perhaps we'll find his picture in the tree above...

We celebrated a little bit of Christmas at home too. We assembled this gingerbread house puzzle and glued the pieces together.
There's glitter on the puzzle too, but you may not be able to see it in the photo. We also put together a glow-in-the-dark dinosaur puzzle, but it kind of got messed up when we tried gluing the pieces together. I doubt we're going to fix it. With young boys and an ADD aunt, we've moved on to other activities.
Activities such as Jenga and Twister. The boys liked them okay. I think they'll like them better when they get a little older. I can't wait. So instead we focused on some wooden toys I had also purchased for them. I added a couple of stickers to each and they insisted to add more. How awesome is that?!

Here is Christopher's helicopter:
Also to my delight, the boys have learned to make funny faces!
Speaking of toys and funny faces, I'm going to take this moment to digress for a bit... can someone please explain this to me?
There are two big shelves of stuffed bears at my sister's friend's home where we celebrated Thanksgiving this year. I don't mean to be disrespectful, since she fed me and all, but I just don't get it. I mean, I have seen and heard of adults having huge collections of dolls and stuff animals, but I just don't get it. Of course I had to inquire about her collection. They are specialty bears from all around the world. I certainly appreciate the diversity, but it's a little strange, right? I guess I shouldn't poo poo it during this time of wholesomeness and purity. I presume a collection of stuff animals is part of that. Indeed I complimented her bears and smiled cordially in the most purest and wholesome way, supressing my naturally sarcastic thoughts. See, I'm all about the holidays yo.

Now back to funny faces... Happy Holidays!!

Valentine's Day

I didn't make any chocolate chip cookies like I had indicated. I tried. But the 99 Cents Only store ran out of Pilsbury Doughboy cookie mix. So oh well.

But for Vday, I still tried the domesticity thing. It's actually not bad and kind of fun if you play house with the right people.

DV8 and I made dinner instead -- Pecan-crusted honey baked salmon, sauteed spinich with garlic, and brown rice simmered in onion soup.

By the way, I must mention that DV8 caught the salmon with his bare hands at a fishing expedition in Canada. It's quite amazing, I know. I suppose he's quite the hunter. If this were prehistoric days, our house would be a cave, we'd wear furry thongs, and it would likely be my job to scale and clean the captured fish for our consumption. Thank god it's modern times and we can hire people to do that for us. It's better that way. I like to do my part to promote the economy.

Speaking of prehistoric times, which usually leads me to think about evolution, here's an article, also fished out by DV8, that describes a newly discovered biological reason for why humans aren't good at monogamy. You should read it for yourself for full comprehension... but, basically, it's all about the battle of the sperm! They're aggressive little fuckers, aren't they? It's good I date stoners.

Gong Hay Fat Choy!

I like this photo a lot. The Rats are doing a dance off!!

Super Fat Tuesday

Although I would have been more excited if Obama won California (with only 30% of California precincts reporting at the moment, I still have faith that the tides may turn by morning...), I still thoroughly enjoyed my first ever Super (and) Fat Tuesday.

I made jambalaya for the first time ever:

I made it from scratch and used the crock pot Blu-tooth gave me for my birthday last year. It's my first time ever using a crock pot. It was surprisingly fun and easy. Yeah, I approve. And, yes, that's corn.

Here's an artsy photo of my jambalaya:


For my efforts, DV8 brought me mardi gras beads. I didn't even have to show my tits (though I felt compelled to, due to the holiday spirit).

This one is my favorite:


The festivities continued with election results on TV. We switched between Katie Couric on CBS and Brian Williams on NBC. Both sucked. But what can you do when you only have Channels 2 & 4?

I found the elections to be quite exciting, even the Republican race was fascinating... until Obama lost California. All of a sudden my Tuesday didn't feel as super or as fat. But I remain hopeful.

TGIF

Thank God It's FEBRUARY! So much to celebrate this month. And, believe it or not, I'm beginning the February festivities with the Superbowl. I'm currently watching on Blu-Tooth's new hi-def 40 inch HD plasma TV!! Dude, I don't even know what that means except the image is really pretty. Crisp vibrant colors and no fuzzy lines. And from what I understand, all the households have one of these. It's quite the rage.

In celebration of Superbowl 42, I made guacamole for our taco bar. I also plan to make some Nestle Tollhouse cookies for dessert. As you can see, domesticity = special day.

I aspire to be domestic on these other special days:

February 5 -- Super Fat Tuesday
Making jambalaya and watching election results wearing underwear and mardi gras beads.

February 7 -- CHINESE NEW YEAR!
Maybe I'll mix my own dipping sauce for hot pot at Blu-tooth's.

February 14 -- Valentine's Day
Making chocolate chip cookies for all my hos and bitches.

February 18 -- President's day
Sorry, I'm straight chillin. Maybe I'll make chili and clean the bathroom.

February 29 -- Leap Year
Thinking of bringing twinkies and hostess cup cakes to Lady Pun's Leap Year party at her new downtown loft. Seems appropos with things you should do and eat once every four years. Ooh, maybe I should bring some acid too.

Happy February to All!

Hookers for Jesus

Peeps, check this article out. Next time I'm in Vegas, I'm going to look for these bitches so I can get a HOOKERS FOR JESUS tshirt.

On that note, happy new year everyone!

My theme for this year is:

BALANCE OXIDANTS WITH ANTI-OXIDANTS.

You can interpret that both literally and figuratively.

Check out themes from previous years.

Also, I plan on returning to blogging... yay! And since I neglected blogging for much of 2007, expect me to be like a VHI special and report hightlights of 2007 only a month into the new year!

Happy Thanksgiving!

For Thanksgiving, my sister made four deserts. This is pretty impressive for a woman who grew up in a Chinese family. For dessert, Chinese people usually eat fruit or, if it's a special day, almond gelatin yo.

Chocolate Souffle

Pumpkin pie

Cheesecake (with lemon zest)

And her prized work of the evening...
APPLE PIE (a la mode, bitches)

And a bonus for your holiday pleasure:

I asked the kids to wave around their American flags with pride!
Don't call me unpatriotic, bitches.

Happy Father's Day

to YIP YEE, the best father in the world. And I'm not saying this because he's my dad. He really is. Look it up if you don't believe me.

Peace out to all the big poppas out there!

Mother's Day

This is the second year in a row that I spent Mother's Day with Lady Simzie, as my sassy mother (pictured above) is in Chicago and I'm in LA and that's how it goes. Single tear...

Still, it is very uncharacteristic of DYY not to celebrate a holiday. Thank god that Lady Simzie is a mom, so at least we can celebrate in her honor.

Here's Nihkil, wearing the SAG shirt I bought for him! We're chillaxing at Santa Monica Beach.
Baby #2 (Jovan Joseph maybe?) is due in July. With one baby and another in tow, Lady Simzie is still the hottest MILF I know.

I know you agree.

Happy Mother's Day to all MILFS. You bitches are hot.

Happy May Day!!

To all the workers of the world, I toast this day to you!

I wish I could participate in the rallies today, but I am too busy working for the workers. Ya know?

Happy Four Twenty!

Happy International Women's Day!

(Please note that I started this post on the date indicated above but sadly was too busy to finish it. Don't get confused, ok? I don't want you going around wishing women a happy day and looking foolish and ignorant. You should have done that last Thursday, though it's a good thing to greet someone in the spirit of feminism. Anyway, thank you for your patience.)

To my Sisters in the struggle, this is OUR day. You are special and beautiful, and DYY loves you very much. So shine, bitches, shine!

In celebration of OUR day, a group of my female friends (including Tron, of course) and I went to check out Andrea Zittel's CRITICAL SPACE exhibit at the MOCA Geffen Contemporary. She's the featured artist of WACK! Art and the Feminist Revolution, the latest big exhibition at MOCA. I attended the member's party last Saturday. Le Tigre was dj'ing and they were cool and all but it was fucken crazy crowded and we had to wait in line for a long while before we were allowed to enter the museum to see the exhibition. To my chagrin (since I don't do lines anymore, well, not those types of lines), most of the art and artists were uninspiring... EXCEPT Andrea Zittel who is amazing and is my absolute favorite artist at the moment. Seriously, I wish I could be her.

Andrea was even better and more inspiring the second time around. I encourage everyone to check out her exhibit. You will be in awe.

For a far better description, check out her biography here. But this is why I adore her: She incorporates art in her everyday life and challenges that life with her art. She pushes our conception and construction of time and physical space. For example, she would create these tiny living spaces that incorporate a bedroom, bathroom, or whatever, and maximize the space so that every inch is utilitarian and functional, yet super designy and modern... so when you look at it, you think to yourself, damn this space is small, but I think I can live like this because everything looks so cute and comfortable.

Did you know that many of her structures can be folded into a trunk (which I had not noticed the first time)? Not only does she challenge the fallacy that bigger is better, she also believes in self-sustainable living and makes all her own very stylish clothes, furniture and architecture.

I am once again inspired to learn how to sew! I wish I knew how to make cool shit. Since her exhibit, I have also been thinking philosophically about my own lifestyle and my perpetual quest to downsize and minimize in order to truly expand and maximize. It's a struggle, man... but I've come to realize that the creativity and adaptivity that derives from such a struggle is really amazing and quite fulfilling. It's a natural high.

I can really go on and on about Andrea's pieces as she's quite prolific and diverse. But I know I'm not doing her any justice so visit her website for a glimpse of her genius. By the way, Andrea's a part-time resident of Joshua Tree and creates a majority of her art and conducts experiments there. Now do you see why I want to be this bitch?