The Warm on Terror

A government-funded report issued last week by a group of retired U.S. generals and admirals says global warming is a security risk. The Military Advisory Board says climate change "can act as a threat multiplier," with severe weather and drought leading to mass migrations, battles over food and water, and the spread of disease. Noting that conflicts in places like Darfur and Somalia began with drought and other resource shortages, the report urges the U.S. to "commit to a stronger national and international role to help stabilize climate changes at levels that will avoid significant disruption to global security and stability." It also says military bases in some areas are vulnerable to rising seas. Former Army chief of staff Gen. Gordon R. Sullivan says he has moved from skeptic to believer: "The trends are not good, and if I just sat around in my former life as a soldier, if I just waited around for someone to walk in and say, 'This is with 100 percent certainty,' I'd be waiting forever."

Beware of FLOPS

How can I write about new animals without discussing FLOPS?!?!

A couple of weekends ago, I returned to Anza Borrengo to celebrate Tonkhero's birthday. The celebratory event turned out to be a weekend of discovery and learning, especially about the negative effects of global warming. Let me introduce you to a FLOP:


Don't even try. You ain't going to find any information about a FLOP in the world wide web. FLOPS are an entirely new species, a by-product of global warming actually. Since we were the first to discover FLOPS, we took the liberty to name them (thanks to the Lady Pun) as well as study them on behalf of the human race. Just remember you learned it here first.

What is it?
A FLOP is the retarded mutant cousin of a fruit fly, a little insect about 3mm long. While fruit flies live and prosper in moist areas, the FLOP lives in the arid dry heat of the desert. Because there is not enough water in the desert for FLOPS to survive, their total life expectancy last only 3 hours.

Life cycle of a Flop
The flop egg is about half a millimeter long. It takes about ten minutes after fertilization for the embryo to develop and hatch into a worm-like larva that flies! The larva eats and grows continuously, molting one minute, two minutes, and four minutes after hatching (first, second and third instars). After six minutes as a third instar larva, it molts one more time to form a pupa. Over the next hour, the body is completely remodeled to give the adult winged form, which then hatches from the pupal case and lives for 3 hours.

Research on Flops
There is none. Until now.

We discovered that flops are extremely complex organisms. Embryonic development is where most of the attention is concentrated, but there is also a great deal of interest in how various adult structures develop in the pupa, mostly focused on the development of the compound eye, but also on the wings, legs and other organs.

We observed:

(1) Since Flops have a short life expectancy, they love to get together and party. They roll deep and fly around like it's 1999.

(2) Flops are harmless and good-intentioned, but extremely annoying and relentless, and tend to occupy more space than appreciated by humans. But they can't really help it. There are like billions and billions of them. Kind of like Chinese people.

(3) Essentially, flops are all over the place -- your clothes, your food, all over your body. We felt anxious about the flops, especially the small larvae ones, flying into our noses and ears. I think they got stuck in my hair and chilled in the crevices of my body.

Below are some campers who tried to shield themselves away from the flops:

It was a futile attempt. You can't tell from the picture because my camera only has 3.2 mega pixels, but the flops were all over these ladies, and the lenses of my camera. Too bad the flops are so small we couldn't capture them in this photo. If you saw how many flops were flying around, you would be kind of disgusted.

(4) But interestingly, you don't get disgusted. Flops are clean insects that do not spread germs... yet. We predict that future generations of flops may carry deadly diseases as their immune systems get stronger, and they become far more physically and intellectually superior than humans.

DON'T LET FLOPS DOMINATE THE WORLD.

STOP GLOBAL WARMING NOW.

How to Talk to a Climate Skeptic

The other day I had inadvertently entered into a heated discussion about global warming with a friend of mine. He simply doesn't believe that global warming exist. He thinks someone is "pullling the wool over our eyes" in order to get more funding to do research about something that is myth. I believe he also used the word "propaganda." I responded with words like "right-wing" and "Christian fundamentalist," but I can't be sure. I was already too upset. I guess I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I mean, I had heard of people who attempt to debunk global warming. I just didn't realize any of them were my friends. It's kind of like when another good friend of mine (who shall remain nameless for her safety and protection) told me she voted for Bush in 2004. That admission rocked my world. I was in shock for weeks. I still shudder when I think about it.

Anyway, Grist Magazine just released a very comprehensive guide on HOW TO TALK TO A CLIMATE SKEPTIC. It's very good. I plan to study this and advertently enter the debate with my friend again.

Hungry polar bears are no fun

The Bush administration has decided to propose listing the polar bear as threatened under the Endangered Species Act, putting the U.S. government on record as saying that global warming could drive one of the world's most recognizable animals out of existence. Rising temperatures in the Arctic are shrinking the sea ice that polar bears need for hunting.

The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service officials had concluded that polar bears could be endangered within 45 years. "We've reviewed all the available data that leads us to believe the sea ice the polar bear depends on has been receding. Obviously, the sea ice is melting because the temperatures are warmer."

Polar bears normally swim from one patch of sea ice to another to hunt for food, but they are not accustomed to going long distances. In September 2004, government scientists observed 55 polar bears swimming offshore in the Alaskan Beaufort Sea, which was considered unprecedented, and four of those bears died. In a separate study that year, federal scientists identified three instances near the Beaufort Sea in which polar bears ate each other.

Dude, that's sick. We humans need to stop ruining the earth for other living creatures. Stop Global Warming Now! Hey, that could be a nifty t-shirt for 2007...

The Women of Biodiesel

Women continue to rock.

If you've been wondering what to get that renewable energy fan in your life, look no further. The Women of Biodiesel is an illustrated calendar featuring idiosyncratic photographs of 12 women involved in sustainable biofuel production. Not only will it bring a smile to your face, but it serves as a sweet introduction to a community where people convert waste vegetable oil into fuel for their diesel Volkswagens, acting locally while thinking about the Big Energy picture.

We need a Southern Cali version! You know I would LOVE to model on the hood of my station wagon!

I joined the Alt-Fuel Movement!

That's right, bitches. After not having a car for one full year, DYY is now the proud owner of an old ass 1980 Mercedes 300TD station wagon that runs on 100% pure vegetable oil!

I named my new car Dolores. Please welcome Dolores with open arms!

I purchased Dolores about a month ago from this Father and Son team in Santa Maria who purchases, re-builds and re-sells diesel Mercedes after converting them to run on veggie oil. These guys are pretty cool.

This is my Beauty Pageant Wave... waving BYE BYE to petroleum and evil bloodsucking oil corporations and HELLO to reuseable waste oil from restaurants!

West Coast for Life, Baby.

This is my gesture of love to drivers who will undoubtedly honk at my Dolores for her slow speed and tempura-smelling exhaust.

South America is the Shit

Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez called President Bush "the devil" at the U.N. General Assembly today.

"The devil came here yesterday," Chavez said, referring to Bush's address on Tuesday and making the sign of the cross. "He came here talking as if he were the owner of the world."

Chavez, who has joined Iran in opposing U.S. influence, accused Washington of "domination, exploitation and pillage of peoples of the world."

Hugo Chavez is my hero. Him and Gandhi.

Other exciting news is happening in Porto Nacional, Brazil. Farmers are being contracted by the government and some major corporations to grow castor beans, soybeans, palm oil and other crops for the purpose of developing biodiesel. Derived from animal fats or vegetable oils, this substitute for petroleum diesel is generating ten of millions of dollars from investors.

No country has been more successful at displacing fossil fuels with green energy than Brazil. Hammered by the oil shocks of the 1970s, the nation committed itself to developing a domestic ethanol industry to reduce its dependence on imported petroleum.

Will other countries follow Brazil's lead? Let's hope...

Big ups to Cali

California lawmakers and Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger reached an agreement today to make the state the first in the U.S. to impose a cap on greenhouse gas emissions.

The Global Warming Solutions Act aims to cut emissions to 25 percent by 2020 with an enforceable cap and mandatory reporting for top polluters like energy companies.

As the most populous state in the US, California is the world's 12th largest emitter of greenhouse gases. But the Terminator wants to change all that.

Last month Schwarzenegger signed an accord with British Prime Minister Tony Blair establishing joint research into cleaner-burning fuels and technologies. Now look what he's doing today!

But the governor's commitment to emissions caps puts him at odds with the White House and the Republicans in the California legislature, who are concerned that such restrictions would be too costly for businesses and the economy.

Tough shit. Why should we sacrafice the earth so that corporations can squeeze the most profits out of their businesses? I'm so tired of these blood-sucking fuckers. I hope they choke on greenhouse gases.

Pass the bug spray

Yet another consequence of global warming... the return of the Bubonic Plague!

Researchers publishing in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences found that a rise of just 1.8 degrees Fahrenheit in the springtime temperature led to a 59 percent increase in plague prevalence (currently, up to 3,000 cases are reported each year around the world). The researchers focused their study in Kazakhstan, where the primary host of the plague is the great gerbil (no, really). The gerbils carry fleas, which carry the bacterium Yersinia pestis, which causes the plague, which gets transmitted to humans by the fleas. Yersinia likely triggered both the Black Death, which killed more than 20 million people in the Middle Ages, and a 19th century pandemic in Asia that killed tens of millions. Depressingly, both outbreaks occurred during warm, wet climatic periods.

Hmm, warm wet climate ... sounds familiar.

Water conservation is fun!

A reader of Adbusters Magazine writes:

I've noticed that most people leave the water running full blast while they brush their teeth. As an experiment, I did likewise, but left the plug in the sink. In an average quick brush of less than a minute, the sink filled up with four liters of water. This means that if you brush twice a day, you'll needlessly waste about 3,000 liters a year. So instead, simply wet your toothbrush, brush away, and then turn on the tap for a final rince, and you've done a small part to change the world.

DYY admits that she used to to leave the faucet on when she brushed her teeth. But no longer... and she's not experiencing any withdrawal symptoms either. In fact, it's probably one of the easiest habits to change in an effort to conserve water.

Water Crisis: not just for poor countries anymore. Industrialized nations must make drastic policy changes if they wish to maintain water supplies, warned the World Wildlife Fund last week, as supply declines thanks to everything from global warming to wetlands loss. A report by the International Water Management Institute said that a third of the world faces water shortages; water use has increased by six times in the last century and will double again by 2050, mostly from agricultural use. WWF suggests a combination of solutions -- conserving, repairing infrastructure, reducing pollution, and requiring agriculture interests in rich countries to pay more for water and be held accountable for efficient use -- but noted that implementing common-sense measures "in the face of habitual practices and intense lobbying by vested interests has been very difficult."

Here's some more very easy tips to conserve water in your household:

1. Water your lawn only when it needs it. Step on your grass. If it springs back, when you lift your foot, it doesn't need water. So set your sprinklers for more days in between watering. Saves 750-1,500 gallons per month. Better yet, especially in times of drought, water with a hose.

2. Fix leaky faucets and plumbing joints. Saves 20 gallons per day for every leak stopped.

3. Don't run the hose while washing your car. Use a bucket of water and a quick hose rinse at the end. Saves 150 gallons each time. For a two-car family that's up to 1,200 gallons a month.

4. Install water-saving shower heads or flow restrictors. Saves 500 to 800 gallons per month.

5. Run only full loads in the washing machine and dishwasher. Saves 300 to 800 gallons per month.

6. Shorten your showers. Even a one or two minute reduction can save up to 700 gallons per month.

7. Use a broom instead of a hose to clean driveways and sidewalks. Saves 150 gallons or more each time. At once a week, that's more than 600 gallons a month.

8. Don't use your toilet as an ashtray or wastebasket. Saves 400 to 600 gallons per month.

9. Capture tap water. While you wait for hot water to come down the pipes, catch the flow in a watering can to use later on house plants or your garden. Saves 200 to 300 gallons per month.

10. Don't water the sidewalks, driveway or gutter. Adjust your sprinklers so that water lands on your lawn or garden where it belongs--and only there. Saves 500 gallons per month.

Denial

I can't believe there are people, many in positions of power, who still deny that global warming exist, despite unrefuted scientific evidence. In fact, there is no significant disagreement within the scientific community that the Earth is warming and that human activities are the principal cause.

Ignorance is bliss, I guess. I wonder if the victims of Katrina, or the families of loved ones who recently died from the heat, are blissful now. Soon we'll all die from heat or flooding, and be extinct like the dinosaurs. And only the cockroaches will survive.

We need to be like our friends, the cochroaches, and do what we need to do to survive. We as people of the Western hemisphere have lived so comfortably for the last several centuries, and we have so much privilege and opportunity to change our bad habits that negatively affect people of poor and war-torn countries, vegetation, and animals of the world.

Like the thinning of the ozone layer, the effects of global warming are reversible... and it starts with personal use and conscientious consumption. Only until we can change the way we live, thereby changing market supplies and demands, is when major perpetrators like corporations will change. And you know our government will do whatever the corporations tell them to do.

In light of the unbearable heat and power shortages across the nation, here are some simple tips to saving energy:

• Appliance Maintenance

Your appliances need a tune-up too; clean all filters and coils.

• Clean Your Light Bulbs!

Don't forget to clean your light bulbs (while the power is off). Dust build up can reduce the light intensity by 25%.

• Enery-Efficient Applicances
  

When buying a new appliance, choose an energy-efficient one.

• Energy Efficient Light Bulbs

When replacing hard to reach light bulbs, such as exterior porch lights, switch to energy efficient compact florescent bulbs. You won't have to change them for seven years!

• Home Insulation

Make your home more energy efficient through improved insulation, caulking and weather-stripping. The less energy you use, the less impact you have on the environment.

• Set the thermostat

Install and use a programmable thermostat. For every 1° C you lower your thermostat you can save 2% on your heating bill. A reduction of 3° C at night and when you are away during the day provides optimal savings and can reduce your GHGs by half a ton.

• Wash with cold water

Wash your clothes using cold water. Many detergents clean just as well in cold water.

• Window Coverings

Use your window coverings to help warm or cool your house.

Here's another simple one: Turn off your lights, tv, computer, etc. when you're not using them! This is my ultimate pet peeve! Arrggghhhhh!

Brace yourself!

Cuz it's getting HOT in huurrreeee!

"People talk about tipping points," said Scripps' climatologist Tim Barnett. "We have gone past it. There is nothing we can do to stop it now. The only question is how big a hit we are going to take."

This month's weather has been for many Southern Californians a perceptual tipping point that brought home the possibility of global warming, just as the fury of Hurricane Katrina did for the people of New Orleans.

Inside the air-conditioned darkness of the Majestic Crest Theatre in Westwood, Max Furstenau was cleaning up after a showing of "An Inconvenient Truth," in which former Vice President Al Gore made the case for global warming.

Outside, the weather had finally cooled to the comfortable mid-80s. The day before had hit 110 degrees, breaking the record of 107 set in 1954.

"I know it's happening," Furstenau said.

Me too.

Fuck you and your hummer!

(Check out this cool website for more F-U pictures.)

The good news out of Detroit is that the largest version of the Hummer – the 10,000 pound, less than 10 mpg, $150,000 Hummer H1 – is being scrapped by General Motors due to lagging sales.

However, sales for the entire Hummer fleet – including the H2 and H3 models which boast whopping 13 mpg and 16 mpg fuel efficiencies, respectively – TRIPLED nationally between March 2005 and March 2006. According to The Wall Street Journal "people are buying Hummers precisely because of high gas prices – buyers want the world to know they can afford the gas." (If you were wondering who the 29 percent of Americans are who still support George Bush, look no further!).

Don't Chop a tree for Sticks!

Beijing recently imposed a new 5% tax on manufacturers that make disposable chopsticks.

It's a good way to save the nation's vanishing forests — one chopstick at a time. China carves up about 45 billion pairs of disposable chopsticks a year. That means certain death for about 25 million full-grown poplar and birch trees.

DYY praises this new tax! In fact, DYY believes that we should all discontinue using disposable utensils and carry our own re-useable chopsticks, forks, spoons and knives everywhere we go! They can come together in cute little re-useable sacks with kitchy or cool designs and far-out colors!